We’re telling this tale on October 24, Break Dancing Day. Whip out the old cardboard and do the worm! Do the windmill! Do the helicopter! Do the bronco! Whoo-hoo!!
Previously on Wild Arms 3:
Come on grab your friends, we’ll go to very Faraway Lands.
With Asgard the Golem and Virginia the Human
The fun will never end, it’s Kizim Flame Time
Now let’s use that working elevator.
But the switch on the bottom floor isn’t working so well. Anybody have a clue on how to activate that bad boy?
How about we use a nearby platform to get a little height?
And then, after we drop on the switch, flip up on that grate to reach an open door?
And maybe we could get in a fight where the treasure is worth noting.
A Baselard can be a random drop in this area. This is an accessory that was previously dropped by a boss (specifically Janus when he first went fish-guy), and can now be found in infinite supply by slaying local creatures. It is not that great of an accessory (free action canceling, oh boy), but just be aware that this sort of thing starts being available around here.
And speaking of loot, our next tool is in the next room.
But we don’t have a moment to enjoy it, as the treasure is trapped.
This looks like a basic Vacuumon, a common monster in this dungeon.
And in my PS2 “boosted” playthrough, it was. But! In my less powerful PS5 playthrough, Vaccy lived long enough to use the Eject ability.
Which instantly ended the battle without any rewards…
And teleported the whole party back to the entrance! What a hassle!
… Or it would be if there were more than one room between here and the elevator back to where we were. I never saw Eject used by another monster in this dungeon, but I would not want to get hit by that if we were further in.
Anywho, back to that room below the elevator. Mighty Gloves is a new Clive tool, and it allows Clive to lift certain blocks, or push certain other blocks. Sorry, nothing more complicated than that basic function. Clive seems to get all the abilities that might have combat purposes, but only ever work on specific obstacles. Would have liked to use those bombs on that last monster…
The puzzle of any given Mighty Gloves task is that you can only ever move a block two squares over, with Clive pivoting around the place of one “block”. Lifting blocks up onto a ledge is, like having glowing hands, not a big deal.
And then there are these “push” blocks, which work like classic “ice puzzles”. Pushed blocks will slide until they hit another obstacle (wall, block), and the challenge is not shoving all the blocks into an unusable corner.
And don’t forget to grab treasure while you are playing with your new toy.
As you might expect, the rest of this dungeon is wall-to-wall boring corridors or Mighty Glove puzzles. It is the way of things.
Ah, here’s a fun one.
First, we’re going to ignore this puzzle and scoot over to an open door to the east. Here, we’ll find a gimel coin and…
Oh boy, two mimics.
Over in PS5 land, I want to note that our first mimic fight literally killed Clive, and left our party hurting for the rest of the dungeon. Now two of ‘em can’t even knock off half of Jet’s HP.
Our reward is Robber’s Ego. This is an accessory that dramatically increases the chance of disarming booby traps on battle-reward chests. For fairly obvious reasons, this can be a major boon, and is well worth the Ability Points in your more dangerous dungeons.
Now back to this room.
Despite the fact that mo’ boxes could equal mo’ problems, there isn’t much to worry about here.
Every box just needs to be moved over exactly one box length. The biggest issue here is that Clive might get a hernia that would impact his ability to life his adorable daughter.
Done with that.
The absolute next area in the plot requires the Sand Vessel, so keep track of those Dragon Fossils if you haven’t already slain a giant Dragon Fossil-based monster.
Not too much dungeon to go here. Enjoy some gems for your troubles.
Since the Mighty Gloves mean you always must move a block over two spaces, you technically have to move the left block to the right switch, and the right block to the left switch.
Criss cross applesauce.
When you reach the giant, glowing green thing, it is probably a good idea to save.
“Did anyone think to bring goggles!?”
Pretty standard fantasy trope there, Virginia.
You would think that a culture that harnessed the infinite power of cold fire would have thought to write a few things down, but, sure, prehistoric.
Oh, they know how to use it all right. By the way, do you care about there being any living thing left on Filgaia?
The Kizim Fire appeared in Wild Arms (1). It was distinctly an Elw invention in that universe, but it is implied (here and in a later dungeon) that it is a distinctly human invention here. But it wouldn’t be the first time humans stole a technology from a native culture and claimed it as their own…
Welp, we got that Kizim Fire without any fuss. Let’s eject ourselves back to Humphrey’s Peak as quickly as possible.
“…A vessel said to have come from a distant land…Out of all artifacts we know of, this one seems to have made the biggest mark.”
Ah, there we go. Just doing the boss fight out of order this time.
“Did you have to solve a bunch of block puzzles, too?”
Melody is straight up here just to murder the party. Surprisingly enough, she does not care about that artifact of unimaginable power they are now lugging around.
Melody’s “plans for the future” involve a reservation at Gunner’s Heaven tonight for one of their big salads, so she is in kind of a rush.
“What does this weakened, unsightly little planet need? It needs strength, and beauty…How dare you stand there and oppose me!”
Really do not want to see Melody’s planetwide makeover montage.
Wretched automaton. Last time we fought this guy, we literally died.
Hopefully we will see a better outcome this fight.
Oh, you know it’s a plot battle when you see those reward stats. Don’t waste a lucky card on this fortress.
But shooting the ‘bot seems to be helping.
A couple of rounds in, Asgard uses that move that was homicidal the last time.
Here is a shot from the PS5 playthrough. As you can see, it bites off about 50% of our maximum HP, but is survivable.
I said it was survivable, guys.
“Hey! Let’s see how clean your existence is after running around a thousand-year-old dungeon!”
Melody is big into aesthetics. We get it!
Clive seems to be the persistent rival to Melody. I appreciate that the writers didn’t go for the obvious “tomboy Virginia versus head cheerleader Melody” dichotomy.
You going to attack with lipstick and blush? Actually, that might be cool…
“BEAUTY BEAM ACTIVATE.”
No. Melody. But partial credit for talking at all.
You two have met, like, once. You could have had the same reaction to one of Janus’s cronies.
One question, Jet. Just one.
Battle 2! Asgard now teams up with Melody.
Melody is just as ineffectual as before, albeit now she will attack characters other than Clive.
Though the trick is that Asgard will 100% guard any attacks aimed at Melody.
So targeting Melody with anything will lead to Asgard absorbing the hit.
And Asgard really knows how to absorb a hit.
And, while it is not reciprocal (that is a later battle), Asgard can dish it out, too.
So target the big boy until they decide to kill you again.
Seriously! That is an instant-death attack that will work regardless of your circumstances.
I do not believe I had a chance to cover it yet, but if you are dead at the end of a battle, your max HP is temporarily dropped. See how everyone’s max is red? That will not be cured until a stay at an inn. This is theoretically a gameplay penalty for just leaving a party member dead on the ground in normal battles, though death is mandatory in this specific circumstance.
Ass-guard just killed the whole party, so they need a breather.
And Melody seems to enjoy seeing us drop dead. This should not come as a surprise.
Just keep puking out those metaphors, Melody.
But what’s this!? Just when they are about to deliver the killing blow, Asgard is malfunctioning!
Scream that at the top of your lungs, Virginia, because…
Werner! Virginia’s dad! Appearing before the whole party for the first time!
Body language says dead, character portrait says happiest moment of her life.
“I’d recognize that smelly old coat anywhere!”
I remember the first time my dad said that to me.
Okay, I thought we already covered this, but if Werner wants to see it…
Asgard might be malfunctioning to the point of being a bug zapper, but they’re ready for round three.
Aside from the handicap of reduced HP, we are ready, too.
Now we’ve got a real battle on our hands.
Asgard will not use their super move or instant death attack (thanks to the malfunctioning), but ‘bot can still throw hands.
Just remember you can fight back, and there isn’t much to it.
Ah, Asgard got Independence Day’d.
You don’t recognize your old coworker, Melody? You should have gone to the annual Aru Sulato Party.
Thanks for the fossil, fossil!
“Gotta get going. Gunsmoke is on.”
Come on, Virginia. You’ve been waiting for this moment your entire teenage life.
“Young lady, you have thirty seconds to express all your hopes, dreams, and emotions or I am leaving.”
Put the ball in his court! That’s the ticket!
“Quiet, bleach boy. He’s your dad, too.”
Oh! Oh! Is this the point in the narrative where Game Theory assumes everyone died in the fight with Asgard, and everything from this point on is some kind of death dream? Always the best part!
“Back to work, guys! Ha ha! Please ignore that some millennia-old dust got in my eyes, and it looks like I’m crying. Total coincidence!”
“Right now, I’m a Drifter…Not his daughter…That’s all…”
“You can be two things, Virginia.”
“Shut your cake hole, Jet.”
Welp, dungeon over.
This “daddy time” feels like a genuine moment. It would be so easy to make a tearful reunion scene, even though the reality of such a situation would likely be closer to what we see: Virginia is shocked at finding her father who she thought was dead or otherwise gone forever, and has no real concept of how to react to the fact that he is standing right there. She even admits that there are decent odds this isn’t even her real father, as she knows she lives in an intermittently supernatural world. She has a million swirling emotions, and she just blurts out the first thing that comes to mind, even if that comes from the very justified well of anger at his abandonment. She wants to have a happy reunion, but this situation is so fantastical, she can’t quite get there.
That said, this event does not serve the character truly, as we all know damn well that Virginia Maxwell sat down at her desk when she was twelve, wrote a seventeen page essay on exactly what she wanted to say to her absent father, and then tucked that note into her kicky little ARM holster. She keeps that “letter” hidden right on the other side of the rose monogram. She was prepared for this! The only reason we never see this exhaustive note is because Virginia is embarrassed by how often her preteen self referenced her obvious crush for boy band Sev’ral Timez.
Anywho, guess we can get back to delivering this ancient artifact. Virginia needs to emotionally recover, so we’ll pick this back up later.
Next time on Wild Arms 3: Everybody look at me, cuz I’m sailing on a boat!