Tag Archives: minigames

FGC #641 God of War 3

Gonna war tonightHere is my idea for the perfect action game: just make 100% of a game based on 10% of God of War 3.

God of War 3 was released in 2010, so you will be forgiven for forgetting the current state of Kratos when this title first hit the Playstation 3. God of War (1) was a self-contained tale of a man that loses his family, blames the God of War, and then fights through hordes of mythical monsters to eventually grow to substantial size and murder/replace that other, equally vengeful god. But, despite this story ending on whatever is the opposite of a cliffhanger (sorry, too many Marvel movies have erased the concept of “finality” from my mind), there were multiple sequel hooks established in a host of unlockable endings. One such finale made the assertion that Kratos was aided on his quest by the almighty Zeus, and the thunder god was only so helpful because Kratos was one of his many bastard children (not going to judge here, Zeus was just not the kind of god that was fond of monogamy or protection). 2007’s God of War 2 decided to run with this thread, and the majority of that game was Kratos defying the Fates to earn an eventual confrontation with his deity daddy. But the deicide/parricide would have to wait, as Athena suffered the killing blow in place of Zeus, and the Z-Man escaped. But! Kratos was joined by the enormous and equally vengeful Titans, and GoW2 ended with the promise of a rock monster versus Mount Olympus battle that would justify the console generation upgrade. You can’t have those kinds of celestial fights on the piddling Playstation 2, mortal!

That's gotta stingSo three years later, the Playstation 3 granted us the conclusion to the Kratos(-is-super-angry) Trilogy. One thing was certain: Kratos was going to fight a lot of gods, and get all sorts of revenge on Zeus. But the in-between could be virtually anything! The God of War titles were never real time strategy games, so how would the multiple assaulting titans be handled? Would Kratos separate from them immediately? Would there be “titan-based gameplay” like what was seen in Shadow of the Colossus? Would Kratos be thrown to entirely new locales by the fury of war? Would you have the ability to summon titans to at least marginally aid in your dirty work? The possibilities were endless!

… And… well… God of War 3 was ultimately a typical God of War title. Kratos dies almost immediately, and once again must fight his way out of Hell/Hades. There are hordes of mythological monsters, and they all can be ultimately trounced by smacking the circle button until something or other is decapitated. Most of Kratos’s surrounding environments are either “magical (deadly) temple” or “generic (deadly) Grecian architecture”. There is the opportunity to participate in a sex-based mini game (this time with a goddess while also cucking a god you are about to murder). And the end of the story is exactly what everyone expected: Kratos formally overcomes his Oedipus complex by punching his father to death… even if that means the collapse of human society. Everybody, please, get over it. Kratos was working through some stuff. If half of Greece must be downed, destroyed, and exposed to a brand-new pandemic to get there, sorry, but Kratos really needed this release. If Zeus was your dad, you would be a lot more understanding.

But long before Kratos is within grappling range of Zeus, there is the start of God of War 3. And the absolute beginning of GoW3? That is one of the single best openings in gaming.

Ye GodsGod of War 3 does pick up exactly where God of War 2 left off. Kratos is literally standing on the shoulders of giants, and he is about to have a big, grand adventure assaulting all of Mount Olympus. And the trick of what happens next? It never stops. Kratos weaves his way in and out of the titans’ assault, and there is not a single moment when the screen is not shaking from a war that will ultimately shatter everything. This is still the beginning of a modern videogame, though, so there are plenty of tutorials, and the narration does seem to assume the player has never so much as pressed an X button before. But even if there are disembodied instructions for how to run following everywhere Kratos cares to go, Kratos is going places. An epic battle is raging, and Kratos is wiping the floor with the legions of heavenly warriors, monsters, and one entire god (on watery crab-horseback!). There is the prerequisite “learn how to push things” block puzzle in there, but it is snappy enough that Kratos can learn how to coddle cubes and get back to the battle in short order. And other than that? It is all battle, all the way, with Kratos utilizing all his end-game abilities from God of War 2 to cut a bloody swath across the area. And even though it feels like the war is never ending, there are still moments in there to introduce important items like save points, the Chains of Olympus, and a few glimpses of areas that will be visited much later in the game.

But whatever the details of the opening of God of War 3, the result is the same: the adrenaline is pumping, and flowing along at an amazing rate. When you are barely ever in the same spot for longer than thirty seconds without a massive flaming boulder destroying the place, you stay alert. When you are constantly fighting, using techniques that are both crushing and (visually) stunning, you are truly feeling the rage of Kratos. And you are already at maximum level from the finale of GoW2! You don’t have to so much as gaze upon a menu to power Kratos up any further. Your anti-hero is already as good as it gets, and all you need to focus on is the death of thousands by your bloody hands.

And then Kratos goes to Hell, and it all goes to hell.

Don't get stuckUpon defeating Poseidon and officially ending the prologue, Kratos falls from Olympus down to Hades. Once there, he accidentally bathes in the River Lethe, loses 90% of the acquired abilities of GoW2, and 100% of health and magic powerups. Oh, and since there is a river involved, Kratos has to swim, which is the most boring thing Kratos ever does in his opening trilogy (leaving some wiggle room here in case Dad of War ever makes swimming fun). From there, you are back to normal God of War “action”. Sure, there are epic battles again (sometimes against Titans, for a change), but it is all very… interruptible. Clear out some ghouls, and it is time to use your red orbs to power the weapon of your choice. Earn a new tool, and then you have to do a tutorial puzzle at the speed of snail to “learn” your new ability, and then perform another two puzzles just to prove you really know what you are doing with your new skill of “can run faster”. Beat a boss, and there is an inevitable refractory period where damn near nothing happens for like three screens (and maybe there is more swimming!).

Basically, once God of War 3 gets going, it frequently finds reasons to stop going. Do damn near anything, and you will be forced to pause to utilize any spoils of battle. Stop and smell the roses, Kratos. You’ll live longer.

And can you think of a worse way to spend an action game? I didn’t come here to pause! I came here to swiftly murder every mofo between here and the top of the mountain!

Even this is funSo here’s my ideal action game: just focus on that intro. Drop the leveling. Drop the pressing against every wall to find hidden health powerups. Drop any puzzle that cannot be solved outside of thirty seconds. Drop the tutorials for every new thing that comes along. Absolutely do not give a player time to “get used to” a new skill: just drop it in there, and if Kratos dies while trying to figure it out, let ‘em die. Keep the pace. Keep Kratos running, jumping, and swinging his chains around like a madman. Do not let the poor, undead godling breathe. Speed never had a twenty-minute intermission where Keanu Reeves had to navigate a skill tree, and Crank never had Jason Statham solve a crossword puzzle for a half hour. This is an action game, dammit, give me some action.

So what do I want from a new action game? The very beginning of God of War 3, and nothing. God of War 3 isn’t a bad experience, but its opening is sublime. And if we could get that, and only that, as an entire game? Well, that would make me as happy as a Kratos with a dead god-dad.

FGC #641 God of War 3

  • System: Playstation exclusive, though that may be Playstation 3 or Playstation 4. I think some of these screenshots are technically from a copy of the HD version being played on the Playstation 5. I can’t remember exactly which controller I was holding at the time…
  • Number of players: Kratos gives friends no quarter.
  • Other Offenders: On the subject of keeping the action going, while God of War 3 does not commit this particular sin, I can safely say that a “Mission Clear” grading results screen is a lack of action, too, Devil May Cry. While we’re at it, Sonic the Hedgehog is on notice.
  • I like green thingsFavorite Weapon: The Nemesis Whip is all sparkly and green, so why would you need anything more? Truth be told, I just like it because it feels like typical “Kratos whip blades” gameplay, but is just different enough to distinguish itself from the previous two games of swinging around the same stuff. Conversely, the Nemean Cestus feels appropriately bulky, but is too much of a departure from the reason I’m playing the game in the first place. You can punch out bad guys in any other game…
  • Favorite God: After lauding the opening, you might think I would choose Poseidon, the deity that caps off that section. But, truth be told, I prefer the “fight” against Hera, as she pretty much just keels over after drinking herself to death. This is an inglorious end, but I appreciate the fact that the designers did not attempt to create a three-part boss battle out of the stages of alcoholism.
  • Favorite Boss Battle: If we are going outside the gods, you have to respect the enormous fight against the gargantuan Cronos the Titan. This really feels like something that was intended to be in God of War 1, but was axed for hardware limitations. But now you can attack a giant’s thumbnail like it ain’t no thang! What more could you ask for?
  • This at least looks funStuff to do: There are a surprisingly high number of ridiculous minigames in this serious game about serious people. There is a “flying” section that seems like it would be more at home in a Sonic the Hedgehog game, some ridiculous puzzles in the labyrinth, and, of course, harp hero. I am not certain who on the design team wanted Kratos to participate in a rhythm game, but please find them, and commit Kratos upon them.
  • Did you know? Kevin Sorbo is the voice actor for a Hercules here that is very different from Sorbo’s role in Hercules: The Legendary Journeys. This is being noted because any appearance by Kevin Sorbo in 2022 is tinged with a bit of… disgust.
  • Would I play again: Why not? This is the most God of War of the original God of War trilogy, so it will likely see a playthrough again before ever touching the PSP “side game”. And, hey, if I get bored, at least the best part of the game is all right there at the beginning…

What’s next? Random ROB has chosen… Portal 2! It’s still alive! And coming next week! Please look forward to it!

They're best friends

WW #14 Everyday Today’s Menu for Emiya Family

Due to the subject matter today, some items may be NSFW. In fact, let this serve as an outright trigger warning for sexual material, rape, rape via magical insects, workplace sexual coercion, and just all sorts of stuff that is traditionally not discussed on this blog. This is confirming that today’s article is rated M for Mature, even if the game itself is not. Also: general spoilers for various TYPE-MOON franchises. Also also, this article is weirdly long! Guess there is a lot to say on this subject…

Let us beginI.

Let’s talk about feminism, Joss Whedon, and at least one cooking videogame.

I suppose we should start with what has been on my mind lately: As a point of fact, I enjoy strong female protagonists. Nine times out of ten, I prefer a female protagonist to a male protagonist. If I am in the mood for noir, I like Veronice Mars. If I want to see some cheesy action, I’ll take Xena: Warrior Princess. I vastly prefer K-On or Azumanga Daioh to any male-centric anime comedy I could name. And when we are talking about ensemble casts, I do often gravitate toward the women (who are usually relegated firmly to “supporting cast”). And, in some randomly introspective moments, I have wondered why that seems to be the case. If I am being generous, I ascribe to the simple theory that I have been watching men’s media since I was a child, so I am tired of hearing about Optimus Prime, and would like to move on to Arcee for a change. I have also never been a particularly masculine man, so it is possible I more readily enjoy characters with arcs that involve less punching and more introspection (Spike has a shootout to solve his problems, Faye gets to reckon with a VHS tape). There are all sorts of reasons that I, a cis white male, would more readily enjoy a woman’s story.

It also might be because…

FGC #358 Feel the Magic XY/XX

FEEL ITYou don’t have to be Senran Kagura to be misogynistic.

We’ve all heard the facts. From practically its inception as a medium, videogames have had a problem with women as objects. You could replace Princess Peach with a particularly valuable fruit bowl, and absolutely nothing about nearly every Super Mario game would change (“You-a better gimme back that fruit bowl, Bowsie!” “Roar!”). Zelda named her series, but it wasn’t until Wind Waker that she was able to even remotely display some personality traits (and even then, her agency dropped the minute she donned a dress). And this isn’t just some artifact of a bygone age: even today “winning the girl” is a problem in a great deal of videogames, even if it’s often disguised as a secondary part of your victory (“Wow, I found the ancient treasure of Los Jaggoff, and, incidentally, the woman that previously thought I was a rival loves me now, too! Score!”). And don’t get me started on games where you can “equip” women like items (looking at you, Xenoblade).

At first glance, Feel the Magic: XY/XX might seem… okay. Yes, it’s immediately and obviously problematic that the entire point of the game is to get the (male) main character laid. Yes, there’s an entire mini game that is all about undressing your girlfriend on the beach by a bonfire, and it’s followed by a game of “heart tapping” that could only be more of an overt metaphor for sex if Prince was involved. Yes, that’s all true, but the game is very tongue-in-cheek about the entire affair. The unnamed hero is not attempting to woo this woman on his own, he’s assisted by a group of silly men in bunny ears. The WarioWare-esque minigames are not all stripping and hand holding, as the majority of them are whimsical takes on reality. Why wait at a bus stop when you can impress a Take it by the hornspretty girl by strapping yourself into a giant hamster ball and bowling over pedestrians? At its core, this is little more than a touch-based minigame collection with the flimsiest of excuse plots, and it seems disingenuous to compare it to the “sexy touch simulators” or “sexy cooking games” of the modern era. Feel the Magic ain’t Custer’s Last Stand, and comparing the two seems like frantic moralizing.

But… the point of the game is still to “win” the girl. The anonymous girl that is incidentally svelte and busty. And, oh yeah, while she doesn’t have a face, you can dress up “the girl” in any outfit/fetish you’d like. That’s right, you can define your prize.

There have been an absurd number of sexual harassment stories recently, but let’s focus on Harvey Weinstein. Weinstein is the producer for a number of amazing films, such as Teaching Mrs. Tingle and David the Gnome: The Movie, but he’s also a serial sexual predator. These two items are not unrelated. I’m no Hollywood insider, but I have seen a few movies. One such movie is the aptly named The Producers, a comedy that tells the story of a mere accountant graduating to becoming a (Broadway) producer. In the modern musical reproduction, protagonist Leo Bloom’s chorus girls distinctly sing, “He wants to be a producer with a great big casting couch”. In the original film, it is merely implied with Leo immediately casting and falling for his leading lady. And that original film? It was released in 1967. “Become a producer, sleep with any woman you want” has been a hoary(/whorey) cliché for fifty years. And that’s just the most immediate example I can recall, it’s all but certain that this kind of rational has been prevalent as long as media has existed.

Cheers!But let’s specifically look back at Harvey Weinstein. I mean, actually look at him. I don’t mean to denigrate a man based on his appearance, but let’s be clear here: he’s a tubby, hairy guy. And there’s nothing wrong with that! Some of my best friends are furry fat guys. That’s okay! But a beer belly doesn’t exactly get the ladies. It absolutely can be attractive to some people, but it’s not the default standard for beauty in the Western world. Weinstein should have no problem finding a girlfriend/wife/whatever, but he might be ice skating uphill if he’s trying to score a supermodel. Or a famous actress. There’s very little obvious appeal to ol’ Harvey, so he had to seek other means to be able to sleep with every woman he could ever want. And everybody knows a producer can do that! Hooray!

Does… does any of this sound completely insane?

Society has dictated that men and women should be monogamous. Sure, that’s fine, but it doesn’t always work out that way. And that’s fine, too, when you get right down to it. People change as they grow, and I can certainly say the woman that was the love of my life in college is in no way the same person I would want to be with today (editor’s note: Goggle Bob is incapable of getting over anyone or anything, and it is amusing when he attempts to claim otherwise). Point is that people can be expected to have multiple sexual partners throughout their lives, and your desires are just as valid if you’ve ever wanted to be with one person or one hundred.

But “every woman you’ve ever seen” is crazy. We can agree on that, right? It’s okay to have a crush, it’s okay to be attracted to people, but it is not okay to force yourself on any person you want. It is not okay to “whip it out” just because your monkey brain determined that those curves in front of you are rather comely. And it is absolutely not sane to think this kind of thing could be okay. The very concept that any woman alive could be yours if you just follow the right steps or “play the right minigames” is absurd because it discounts one very important thing: it disregards the feelings of the woman. She’s just not into you, guys, move on. The idea of everyone on the planet being attracted to one person because they have a proper checklist of traits is bonkers. Money? Fame? Power? It doesn’t matter, because we live in a world where we can’t unanimously agree that ice cream is good. Some people don’t like it! What hope do you have!?

SmexyBut movies don’t work like that. Videogames don’t work like that. Whether it’s played completely straight (“Oh, save me, hero!”) or is more subtle (“Thanks for saving my life, hero. But this doesn’t mean I like you [blush].” ), the message is always clear: save the world, get the girl. It’s always a girl to be won, because of course the hero is male, and it’s always a world to be saved that impresses her. No, it doesn’t have to be a real world that needs saving, you’re welcome to enjoy a great many stories where “the world” is merely a report that needs to be handed in on time or a check the needs to get to the orphanage by this morning, but there’s always some heroic act to be completed. There’s always some perfect way to make sure the ice queen melts, and then it’s just a hop, skip, and a jump into bed. Or implied bed. Let’s face it, the inferred ending to like 90% of “wholesome” Disney movies is wild and crazy nonstop magic sex. Ariel has had legs for like three days, and she’s gonna be pregnant inside of six.

And media, particularly children’s media, is where we learn. Beast was a heel, but he’s going to get his Beauty. Mario has awesome jumping ability, and that’s all it takes to win the Princess. Bruce Willis is going to save his marriage by kicking some terrorists off a building. It all comes back to the same stupid moral: if you do something important, or are something important, you will have that woman, even if she initially despised you. Oh, wait, sorry, I went back to not assigning genders there. She will be yours if you’re important and male. Is it any wonder that men in power have been abusing their power for sexual gain? It’s been the number one lesson that has been reinforced over and over again since they were children. And it’s still happening! Wonder Woman was an amazing bit of feminist movie making, but it also included Steve Trevor implicitly “conquering” that crazy warrior woman that was always taught men are horrible because he was just that great. She’s still thinking about him a century later! You can be that great, too, men! Go for the gold! Go for the wonder!

Seriously?So, yes, Feel the Magic XX/XY might not be the latest breasts-based Marvelous release, but it may be just as insidious. Under the guise of humor and playfulness, it is yet another story of boy does stuff, and said stuff wins the girl. “The girl” is a thing to be won, and she may as well be nothing more than a silhouette wearing a dress. She’s the prize, the goal, and nothing more. And Feel the Magic is just another in a long series of games, movies, and books that instantly reinforces this seemingly accepted truth.

Maybe men should be taught to feel the magic of actually treating women like people instead.

FGC #358 Feel the Magic XY/XX

  • System: Nintendo DS. Given the prevalence of touch gaming, I’m kind of surprised this one didn’t resurface in time for the smart phone revolution.
  • Number of players: You’re going to have to touch by yourself.
  • Favorite Minigame: The nightmare bull rush is pretty fun and frantic. Overall, I’d say a number of these minigames are over before they begin, and the whole presentation lacks the WarioWare “rapid fire” nature that makes those miniest of games so much fun. Not that Feel the Magic is bad, just not nearly as fun as the king of minigames.
  • Please Touch: It’s kind of amazing that this early Nintendo DS title had to do so much to “encourage” the audience to pick up and use that stylus. We now live in a magical world where every damn thing is touchable, but a mere thirteen years ago? Completely new technology.
  • Yay!  Kitty!Say something nice: Vaguely misogynistic or no, I do have to say I love the art style for this game. Everyone being little more than a walking silhouette allows for some interesting visuals, and properly sidesteps the usual “launch game” problem of no one having any idea how to make characters more attractive than jagged rocks.
  • Did you know? This game was developed by Sonic Team! Other non-Sonic Sonic Team games include Burning Rangers, Phantasy Star Online, ChuChu Rocket, and Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg. I want to say that there is not a single game in that list that comes close to this level of lunacy.
  • Would I play again: Not at all likely. Feel the Magic is fun, but it still pales next to WarioWare. And I know which game I’d rather touch.

What’s next? Random ROB has chosen… Spider-Man vs. The Kingpin for Sega Genesis! I know what this blog needs to be popular! More pictures of Spider-Man! Please look forward to it!

BARF
This is probably a metaphor for something

FGC #293 WTF: Work Time Fun

Work Time Fun!Hyperbole has been the domain of videogame opinions practically since the invention of the medium (“Pong is the best thing ever!”), so it’s only natural that, somewhere along the line, a number of people started comparing videogames to work. It’s fun to play Super Mario Bros, but beating every single stage without warp zones? That’s work. Learning the exact death wall sequence in the Turbo Tunnel? That’s work. Wasting ten hours on putting Yiazmat in the grave? Totally work. Couple this with the innovation of trophies and achievements, and you could forgive someone for seeing that all-important “100% completion” achievement as work. And I can’t blame ‘em! 100% Completion in Final Fantasy 13 requires acquiring every item and forging every weapon, which I think can only be accomplished with an Excel spreadsheet and hours of battling trash mobs. Could that be described as anything but work?

But let’s revisit that Final Fantasy 13 example. In order to accomplish that 100% completion, you, player, are commanding a trio of magical warriors to fight voracious coyote monsters in life or death battles. At the end of each battle, you are rewarded with mystical crystal points and piles of crazy crap that may or may not aid you in your goal of collecting every damn thing on one of two unreal planets. Does that sound like work? In a way, maybe, but everything sounds a little more… fantasy than the usual drudgery of the office. And that’s what videogames are: they’re escapes, they’re fun, and those trophies aren’t there to turn a magical land into a dreary workplace; no, trophies are there to give you one more reason to return, one more excuse to hang out with Lightning and Hope and all your friends from this game world. They didn’t make sixty Mega Man games to keep you mindlessly glued to the couch, they made ‘em because they knew you wanted to spend more time with the Blue Bomber and all his big-eyed buddies. Videogames aren’t work! Videogames are fun!

And I know this because I have played WTF: Work Place Fun. This game is fuggin’ work.

You're outVideogames are fun, and that’s because they’re designed to be fun. Something like Venetica might be a useless slog of a game, but somewhere, somehow, someone thought there was a way that was going to be entertaining. Let’s face it: videogames exist to make their makers some fat stacks of videogame cash, and the best way to get a piece of that pie is to get people talking about your game for some reason other than mocking it on Youtube. Castlevania is so fun! Let’s go play it together! … Or something like that. Thus, despite a number of games that people claim are simply there for “trolling the player”, all videogames are meant to be fun, even if the fun may come from some unexpected sources. Mario’s fun is obvious, and Freddy Fazbear presents fun in a very different, very bloodcurdling way. Videogames are like a theme park: whether you’re on the merry go round or the rollercoaster, one way or another, you’re finding a way to enjoy yourself.

But WTF isn’t the merry go round or the rollercoaster. WTF is… waiting in line. WTF might actually be getting puked on by the kid getting off the rollercoaster. And that kid’s name is Randy, and he had so many skittles today, you wouldn’t believe it.

Conceptually, WTF is basically like Warioware: you are presented with a series of minigames, and part of the challenge is not only the obvious “complete this minigame” but also figuring out exactly how to master this game in the most efficient way possible. Yes, you can just hammer the X button, but is that really the way you want to go? Oh, wait, sorry, it’s time for another minigame now, forget everything you just learned and try this new game. And, yes, without question, that kind of gaming can be fun. Ultimate Nintendo Remix might be my favorite game of the last generation for exactly that reason, and, inclusion of Little Mac or not, WTF has every opportunity to be just as fun.

Count for me!But, despite the title, WTF is not fun. WTF takes its minigames to absurd extremes, and challenges the player not to survive or get the high score, but to obtain an insane score in the face of overwhelming boredom. The best example of this design theory is Pendemonium, a game wherein you are tasked with putting caps on pens. That’s it! Sometimes the pens are upside-down, and you have to press a button to flip said pen. That is the one and only challenge of Pendemonium. With a good rhythm, you can probably efficiently cap 1,000 pens in about twenty minutes. Twenty minutes. Just pen capping. And if you want to go for the high score, good luck, because the counter appears to enter into the billions. Assuming I’m doing my math right here, that means you could 100% complete this game sometime around the end of the Trump administration. Oh, and I’m talking about Ivanka. She’s due to be elected in 2032.

And Pendemonium is not an outlier. There’s a baseball minigame that involves catching fly balls… but there will be a number of pop flies that don’t remotely require movement. There’s a game that is based on sorting an endless, monotonous supply of chicks (to be clear, that would the small, chirpy kind of chicks). And, yes, there is certainly a game that includes all the fun of watching clay harden in a kiln. And the more active games aren’t much better, as they’re mostly do-or-die affairs where you’ll fail within the opening moments. Or maybe you would enjoy playing Simon Says with a group of burping muppets, or counting random people on a street crowded with anthropomorphic ducks and aliens. It’s pretty bad when the most fun you can have in this game is with a vague recreation of Frogger.

But, then again, that’s the point.

THIS IS BORINGWTF is a sin eater for its videogame brethren. WTF is not meant to be fun, it is meant to illuminate exactly what can go wrong in other videogames. Impossible goals and boring gameplay are the antithesis of what any videogame should feature, and WTF revels in that depravity. Mary-Kate and Ashley: Magical Mystery Mall is not trolling the player, that was somehow meant to be fun. WTF is a videogame that is trolling the player. WTF is work, and it celebrates the pain of putting too much effort into a teeny, tiny paycheck.

Work Time Fun is a deliberately bad game so that we know that other games are fun.

FGC #293 WTF: Work Time Fun

  • System: PSP. I assume this is also available for the Vita in some way or another.
  • Number of players: Like so many forgotten PSP games, WTF has online and local multiplayer options for trading items and competing against each other. Also, like so many PSP games, no one has ever found another person with a PSP to actually try these features.
  • Favorite Minigame: Mushroom Crossing is pretty much just Frogger, and, thus, pretty much okay. Look, in a game that is actively trying to kill you at all times, you take what you can get.
  • What’s in a name? In Japan, WTF is known as Beit Hell 2000, or, basically, Part Time Job Hell 2000. I want to additionally note that this game was released in 2005.
  • Hot chicksDid you know? I don’t think anyone would play the Persona series if Protag’s after-school jobs were anywhere near this annoying.
  • Would I play again: I actually might if this winds up as a downloadable title on a system I actually use portably (so that rules out the Vita). Though I really doubt we’ll be seeing WTF3D, so probably not.

What’s next? Random ROB has chosen… Skullmonkeys for the Playstation! Monkeys, clay, and monkeys made of clay for days! Please look forward to it!