Tag Archives: zelda

FGC #434 The Legend of Zelda: The Adventure of Link

This is still the coolest part of the gameI have uncovered a startling discovery: all of Link’s problems are not created by Ganon, but the Hyrule monarchy!

Now, let’s be clear here: Ganon is not blameless in his actions. Whether you’re looking at Demise, Ganondorf, or just a bloated pig monster with an over-sized fork, Ganon is irrefutably not a good guy. Yes, he’s a thief from a downtrodden tribe that comes from circumstances, but Ganon is not the root of all evil in Hyrule. That dubious honor belongs to the royal family.

In some titles, this is abundantly obvious. We’ve already discussed Breath of the Wild, and how, had Zelda had just the tiniest bit of foresight, her kingdom would not have fallen to the horrors of technology run amok (though it is nice to see that happen to a nation where Facebook is not involved for once). Similarly, the world of Wind Waker is significantly wetter because the only solution the King of Hyrule had to the Ganon problem was to drown it and literally everything else. Ocarina of Time? More Zelda futzing with prophecies and timelines splitting off because of it. A Link to the Past? Never trust the advisor with blue, clawed hands, kingy. And Twilight Princess? That was a gigantic mess that was caused by not one, but two royal families. And then Zelda made it worse! Basically, we’re looking at the royalty being the number one reason Link can’t just sit around raising cuccos all day long, and has to actually nab a sword from some old man cave.

And while we’re discussing elderly hermits distributing weaponry, yes, this is exactly how The Legend of Zelda started.

A wizard did itEveryone knows the basic plot of the original Legend of Zelda: Ganon kidnaps Zelda, the Triforce of Wisdom is shattered into multiple pieces, and Link is the only one brave enough to save the kingdom. Or he just happened to be around. Actually, it’s probably that latter one, as it is distinctly noted that Zelda sent Impa out to find a hero, and Impa was old and wounded, and… what? Did she literally just go with the first elf she found? Dude didn’t even have a sword yet! Okay, it’s not like Impa imparted any valuable information anyway (“The Triforce pieces are out there! Somewhere! Buy a candle at Famous Cave’s!”), but this was a slapdash effort from the get-go. And why were the Triforce pieces scattered to begin with? Because Zelda had a vision of the coming calamity of Ganon, and her only solution was to “safeguard” the Triforce pieces in a series of marginally hidden dungeons. Did that make a lick of sense? No! You just give the Triforce to someone that can get the hell out of town (I hear there’s a lovely clock city just outside of the kingdom limits), and call it a bloody day. I’ve got news for you Zelda: Link was able to retrieve the Triforce of Wisdom because you hid those pieces poorly. Link was just a dude with a pointy stick, and he still managed to conquer every last dungeon and wind up with more equipment as a result of other dungeon-based goodies. Zelda, do you want Ganon to possess two Triforces and have a raft? Because that’s the end result of your stupid plan if Link had showed up in Hyrule like an hour later. And don’t even get me started on what would happen if multiple people found separate Triforce pieces. Face it, Zelda, you got lucky.

GrrrrBut there was one Princess Zelda that did not get lucky. It is canon that Link had a magical adventure where he teamed up with two different versions of himself and wore a suit made entirely out of bombs, and, sometime thereafter, the royal family of Hyrule required a bit of family counseling. The good King of Hyrule had two children, a boy and a girl. The princess was, obviously, another Zelda, and she was granted knowledge of the Triforce. The boy, whom we’re going to name Prince Don, coveted this shiny, golden treasure, and demanded the Triforce. Zelda would not acquiesce to her greedy, probably orange brother, and Prince Don was forced to take drastic action. He hired a wizard that put Zelda under a sleeping spell for generations. This, obviously, solved exactly zero problems, and Prince Don… uh… does the story elaborate on this at all? I mean… uh… he probably died angry, but he was the only heir, right? He just became king anyway, didn’t he? Totally poisoned a woman in a desperate grab for more power, and he’s rewarded with being the most powerful person in the kingdom anyway. Way to go, prince-y. Good job.

So where was the last piece of the full Triforce, the Triforce of Courage? You know, the secret that Zelda was Sleeping Beauty’ed for? Well, turns out that Prince Don’s dad realized his son was a real crumb-bum, and decided to split the complete Triforce, and hide a solid third of it in a dungeon. Sound familiar? However, this Hyrulian monarch knew exactly what he was doing. Somehow “in secret”, the King of Hyrule…

  1. Hid the Triforce of Courage in The Great Palace of the Valley of Death
  2. Populated the Great Palace with a variety of traps and monsters
  3. Placed an impenetrable barrier around the Valley of Death
  4. Scattered the source of the barrier spell into six crystals
  5. Built six temples to house alters that would activate those six crystals
  6. Populated those temples with six unique boss monsters, and a host of lesser, more annoying regular monsters
  7. And then, just for good measure, cast some weird-ass incantation that would make a hand-tattoo appear on whoever was worthy of finally traipsing through those palaces

Hey, Prince? Bad news: even if you knew where to look, there was no way you were going to make it past Horsehead and the Valley of Death or even your first Iron Knuckle. Your dad screwed you but good, princey.

And, bad news, he screwed Link, too.

GrossThe Legend of Zelda: The Adventure of Link is widely considered to be one of the most difficult The Legend of Zelda adventures. Some attribute this to the 2-D perspective being fairly half-baked, and not at all designed around Link’s butter-knife based offensive abilities. Some blame the magic system, which is inventive, but too many monsters and areas require specific spells, so you’re always running at a magical deficit. And there is certainly some merit to the claim that the experience system is opaque at best, and downright punishing at worst. How are you supposed to get anywhere when some damn flying eyeball is leeching your EXP every five seconds!?

But, no, that all pales before the real reason The Adventure of Link is so difficult: The King of Hyrule hated his son. Dude did not just hide the Triforce, he created a treasure hunt that spread across two continents. He devoted great swaths of Hyrulian resources toward building temples containing boiling lava and holographic walls. And, lest that King think his son had the slimmest chance of throwing those unlocking jewels around, for some damn reason, the King of Hyrule summoned a freakin’ fire breathing dragon just to protect one palace. And that cyclops! Where does one even find food for a cyclops, left alone satisfying other cyclopean biological needs!? The King of Hyrule went to a lot of trouble to arrange this massive undertaking for the exclusive purpose of waylaying his own son. Couldn’t he have just taken the kid to soccer practice? Shown up for a few more school plays? You have the Triforce, King! You could have just wished for your son to be a little less of an asshole! You didn’t have to construct a hover-horse!

I hate youAnd then Link got stuck dealing with the fallout of that failed royal relationship. Lucky guy, that Link. An army of monsters are trying to drain his blood to revive their piggy master, and he’s got to deal with generational family therapy for some royals he’ll never know.

It’s called The Legend of Zelda for a reason. It’s The Legend of Zelda Really Messing Up Some Poor Elf’s Day.

FGC #434 The Legend of Zelda: The Adventure of Link

  • System: Nintendo Entertainment System initially, and then the Gamecube collection, and then I’m pretty sure every Nintendo system since. Currently available on Switch!
  • Number of players: Link is going to have to deal with this mess alone.
  • Favorite Spell: It might just be a way to conserve assets, but granting Link a spell where he transforms into a fairy was certainly a bold choice. And it’s a useful spell, too! Who needs all this jumping when you can just fly?
  • No. 3 Tryforce: I like how the first Zelda sequel introduced a new Triforce. I feel like this tradition should have continued, and, by the time of Breath of the Wild, Link has to collect 25 different Triforces, finally culminating with the Triforce of Muted Apathy.
  • I WINAn End: (Almost) Always restarting in Zelda’s sleep chamber has the excellent side effect of making the ending and final scene of the game in Zelda’s temple rather thrilling. Way to work the emotions with limited bits, Nintendo.
  • What’s in a Name: This was the first Zelda game to stick Link’s name in the title. So much for being an unnamed adventurer/player avatar, Nintendo! He’ll never be the most popular protagonist in all of videogames now, guys!
  • Land of the Rising Fun: There are a number of differences between the Japanese and International versions. Seemingly the biggest change in Japan is that Gooma, the cyclops with a morning star boss of the Palace on the Sea, does not appear at all, and is replaced with a second encounter with Jermafenser, the dude with too many heads. America: land of the myopic.
  • Did you know? Ganon’s laugh is the same sound sample used for Soda Popinski in Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out. This raises all sorts of timeline issues…
  • Would I play again: Anyone that says they enjoy this game is a liar. Or they haven’t played it recently. Or I’m being hyperbolic, and I’m just angry at anyone that can get through Death Valley without abusing save states. So many eyeball ghosts! So much lava! I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life!

What’s next? Random ROB has chosen… Pokemon: Let’s Go Eevee for the Nintendo Switch! Oh boy! We’re going to go somewhere or another, eevee! Please look forward to it!

Get 'em
That is how you do it. You’re welcome.

FGC #404 The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

Let’s talk about limits, phobias, and easy mode.

Limits are important. The old yarn about videogames is that, thanks to the virtual unreality of the digital world, you can do anything in a videogame. And anyone that has actually played a videogame knows that that is bull hockey. Super Mario Bros. is an amazing game, but can you do anything in the Mushroom Kingdom? Heck no. Mario might be able to jump higher than any basketball star, but he still has a limit, and cannot, say, jump straight to the goal flag right from his first bound. Mario is very limited in his movements, but, if you notice the world around him, you will see that his entire universe was designed exclusively for these limits. There is no jump that Mario needs to make that he cannot clear. There is no villain that he must destroy that does not have a weakness. And, since Mario is limited to only running and jumping (and not, say, negotiating with wandering turtle hordes), there is no problem that cannot be solved with that moveset. Mario is limited. Videogames are limited; but that is why they are “games”. A game with no limits and no rules is just a playset, and, given the dismal sales of Endless Ocean, games are exactly what gamers want.

But the best videogame limits are the ones that are completely invisible. Mario isn’t limited by his jumps, he’s super! You can do anything in Grand Theft Auto… except maybe go inside a building. The latest WRPG has incredible freedom and insane realism, though maybe your hero can’t hop over a waist-high fence. But all of these limits are there for a reason, because without them, there would be no game at all (or, in some of the “open world” cases, because otherwise the title require three decades to actually be released). Limits are what make videogames fun, and if they weren’t there, it would be bedlam every time C.J. jumped all the way to a moon nobody ever got around to modeling.

Unfortunately, not all limits can be invisible.

CreepyLink is one of your more limited heroes in your typical Legend of Zelda title (though maybe not in at least one recent entry). He can’t jump (except when absolutely necessary). His traditional offensive options are generally sparse (the sword is a mainstay, but have you ever really tried to take out a Helmasaur with bombs or hammers? They both suck). And, even when Hyrule has been expanded to Switchian levels of size, it’s still a fairly narrow chunk of geography. Mario often vacations in the far off corners of the galaxy, but the best Link can hope for is a quick jaunt to a flying whale’s dreamscape. Or, like in this entry, a visit to Hyrule’s next kingdom over, Termina, where a crash landing moon is going to abolish all life in the immediate area. And all Link can do, as ever, is run around like a cucco and hope that talking to everybody saves the day. Oh, and there’s a time limit now, too. It’s there, and you’re reminded of it every few moments. Actually, that time limit is integral to the entire experience, so you’re more likely to be reminded of it every second.

And, like so many limits in videogames, this is technically a good thing. For possibly the first time in a Zelda title, there is some genuine suspense. The end of the world is coming, and if you don’t do anything, you’re going to be toast in 5… 4… 3… 2… 1. That moon is always there, looming, stalking your every move. You have to complete this dungeon in a timely manner, or everyone is going to die. If you don’t rescue that monkey, if you don’t find the right route through the canyon, if you don’t listen to goddamn Tingle, that moon is going to come crashing down, and it’s over, “Hero of Time”. Or maybe you choose to believe that there is no danger. Maybe you aren’t saving the world from a horror-moon, and you’re working hard because you want to see how much you can complete in a “cycle”. After all, the real world isn’t in jeopardy, and a dead Link doesn’t really mean anything. It’s all about getting what you can get done in your time limit, and, if you have to reset the three day cycle all over again, that’s just the price of “wasting” time. You lose some progress, and that sucks, but it happens.

And that’s the scariest idea of all.

Going for a dipI genuinely believe videogames are art. I also genuinely believe videogames are wastes of time. But in the most literal sense! Videogames are amazing and fun, but the chief way a videogame will punish a player is through wasting time. What is the number one result of “losing a life” in practically any game? It’s a loss of time through having to repeat a section. In other cases, you may instantly respawn, but you also work up to a “continue”, and the threat is that you are one step closer to losing progress. Dying, but with extra steps. Some RPGs have adopted the method of letting you keep your story progress, but you lose gold, equipment, or experience… so you’ve just lost a different kind of progress. And what’s worse? Losing a life and having to respawn somewhere “further back”, or a game where your “life” is captured, and you have to search all over the place to rediscover your lost comrade? That might be up to personal preference, as the end result is the same in both cases: lost time. You could have beaten the final boss by now if you didn’t waste so much time on all those deaths, right? Heard it all before…

So, suffice it to say, by Majora’s Mask’s release in 2000, after a solid decade of gaming like a maniac, the idea of “death = lost time” was already drilled straight into my noggin. Losing time was the enemy, and a game where the hook was that time was constantly against you, and not knowing what you were doing at all times could lead to more lost time… The concept scared me. Hell, I was downright frightened by the idea that I could fill my wallet with rupees, gain every last magical item, and then lose it all because I dawdled too long in a swamp shooting gallery. It didn’t help that this was also the second 3-D Zelda, and the concept of proper camera control was still in its infancy. I’m supposed to find five random kids around town? In only three days? How am I supposed to pull that off when I can barely see around corners? I was never good at finding random skulltulas, so I was already pretty screwed if this game expected me to find hidden children and masks within a time limit. I knew my skills, I knew my limits, and I knew that there was no way I could have ever saved Termina back in 2000. I had so little time as it was, I wasn’t going to waste it on a game that was built around wasting even more time.

So thank Miyamoto for The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask 3D.

Poor LinkIn a lot of ways, Majora’s Mask 3D is an entirely different game. The all-important bosses have been dramatically altered, swimming is an entirely different ball of beavers, and, most importantly, a “save anywhere” feature has been added. This is a game changer, literally, as it means that the game’s saves are no longer tied to losing all progress within a cycle. One of those “frightening” features from the original release has just flown straight out the window. Even better, the presence of constant saving means that some of the more… fiendish minigames can now be savescummed. Not saying I’m a cheater (okay, I absolutely am), but knowing that I won’t lose all my progress to a damn deku scrub minigame goes a long way to putting my mind at ease. And those dungeons lose their bite when a puzzle can be solved over the course of a half hour, and then “reset” so the game only thinks Link only spent thirty seconds on that block pushing. Avoiding lost progress is easy!

And that’s just it: The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask 3D is Majora’s Mask Easy Mode.

And… I think that’s the only way I want to play the game.

Beat itI never completed Majora’s Mask on the N64. In fact, I only really got into playing it at all on the Gamecube Zelda compilation, and, even then, I barely cleared the first palace. It was just too stressful, and that looming threat of losing progress, that unflinching limit, scared me off. I could contentedly sail the seas with Pirate Link, or I could suffer under the gaze of an ever-judging moon. That was no choice at all! But the 3DS version was different, because I could go at my own pace, and I didn’t have to live in fear of an oppressive limit on my play time. I suppose the limit was always there, as that moon certainly hadn’t gone away, but it was so much less oppressive. And “less oppressive” always translates to “more fun”. It may have been easy mode, but without that easy mode, I never would have experienced this entertaining, quirky Zelda title.

So what’s the moral of this experience? It’s not that limits are inherently bad, and it’s certainly not that you should live in fear of arbitrary challenges. No, I suppose our moral today is that sometimes the best way to enjoy a game is suck it up, admit you’re a weenie, and go ahead and play it on easy mode. Don’t limit your experiences by arbitrary skill echelons, and just have fun the way you want to have fun.

You’re allowed to be afraid, but don’t be afraid of easy mode.

FGC #404 The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

  • System: N64 (but only with an expansion pack), and then again on every Nintendo console since. Well, not Switch, but give it a hot minute, I’m sure it will get there. The latest version (with vast improvements) is available on the 3DS.
  • Number of players: This ain’t Mask of Four Swords, buddy.
  • Other Majora Issues: I also may have avoided playing Majora’s Mask initially because it is creepy as all get out. It’s not even that Resident Evil kind of deliberate creepy. It’s more like everything is just… wrong, and Link is trying to save a world that shouldn’t even be in the first place. And I’m still fairly convinced that this all happened because that’s a natural reaction to looking at Ocarina of Time character models.
  • These guysFavorite Character: Everybody wants to talk about Anju and That Kid, but the greatest, saddest love story in Majora’s Mask is the tale of Mikau and Lulu, the Zora lovers. No matter how much Link can control time, Mikau is always going to wind up seagull bait, and Lulu is always going to be stuck talking to a young boy that is wearing her lover’s death mask as a magical prop. Man, this is a weird game.
  • Favorite Mask: There are so many options! Fierce Deity and Lovers are great choices because they’re so insanely difficult to obtain, but that would ignore all the great dumb ones, like blow-yourself-up-all-the-time mask. And the bunny hood was so good, it infiltrated other games! But my pick goes to the Stone Mask, because the idea that it makes Link so plain, he is virtually invisible is fun and biting social satire. It’s perfect!
  • Did you know? This was the first place we had a Tingle breakout. It was mostly contained to balloons and map making, and the little bastard wasn’t too much of a drain on resources, but it seems the infection was destined to grow in later years. As of this writing, he has been mostly relegated to spin-offs, but vigilance is always necessary.
  • Would I play again: The 3DS version? Yes, absolutely. The original N64 title? No, I don’t think that’s going to happen.

What’s next? Random ROB has chosen… to air the Duck Dynasty for Xbox 360 stream from last Friday night! If you missed it live, it’s new to you! Please look forward to it!

What is even happening!?

Year in Review: 2017

2017! Huh! What was it good for? Absolutely nothing! Say it again!

Disappointment of the Year: Super Bomberman R

KapowI say it every year, but the disappointment of the year is not the worst game of the year, it is simply a game that came close to being good, and… didn’t. Super Bomberman R is a Bomberman renaissance, and arguably exactly what I wanted ever since Super Bomberman 2. In fact, it basically is a remake of Super Bomberman 2, just with more modern graphics, portability, online play, and a goofy plot played out in cute, animated cutscenes. It’s the Bomberman we’ve all been waiting for!

Which is why the actual game having significant problems is such a shame. It is clear people that actually care about Bomberman (and Konami) made this game, but they really missed the mark on actual Bomberman gameplay. The graphics are great… but make it extremely difficult to see your lil’ Bomber amongst the chaos. The tiered stages are fun, but determining your exact plateau at a glance is nearly impossible. And some of the traps (ice? Really?) and stage objectives (an escort mission!?) are practically antithetical to the very concept of the bombers.

In short, Super Bomberman R should be an amazing return to form for the entire franchise; but, as it is, I can hardly recommend it. This could have been the preeminent multiplayer experience of the Switch launch…

But everybody just wants to play Mario Kart anyway, so no big deal.

Reason to not let me out of the house for the Year: Amiibo, again

Amiibo!

I want to be very clear about something: If Nintendo decides to release Super Smash Bros. 4 Switch, and uses that as an excuse to do an entire run of 2-Player Alternate amiibos, or, God help us all, “Final Smash” themed giant amiibos, then I’m going to have to jump off a building. Or at least stab my eyes out. Something to stop the inevitable accumulation of even more Nintendo merchandise that I convince myself doubles as some sort of physical DLC. Just, please Nintendo, don’t make me have to cut off my own hands. Please.

Compilation of the Year: Mega Man Legacy Collection 2

I now can finally say I own copies of Mega Man 9 & 10 in physical form, and it’s my annual excuse to post this again.

Everything is coming up Mega Man!

Remake of the Year: Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap

So scenicI’ve never been a giant fan of the Wonder Boy series, because the gameplay has always been a little too close to The Adventures of Link for my taste, and, while I love that game, it can get very frustrating, very fast. Could I have a little range to my attacks? No? Fine, whatever, I really felt like trudging through that forest full of slimes all over again. Thanks. Oh, and don’t get me started on the whole “how health works” system. You want me to spend how much on an extra life that could potentially drop from a random octopus anyway?

But I’ll stop complaining and talk about the good stuff: this title got me to actually enjoy a Wonder Boy game! Hooray! It’s still a very, very annoying Genesis game, and there is just nothing that is going to make “there are a thousand random shops and you need a guide to compare their inventories” any fun, but, man, is this thing pretty to look at. Between the “version switch” button and the gorgeous modern graphics, there were enough quality of life improvements made to Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap that it kept my interest throughout. And that’s the best a remake of a “forgotten” title can achieve.

Title of the Year: Kingdom Hearts HD 2.8 Final Chapter Prologue

So similar...Kingdom Hearts might be an easy punching bag around here, but when you see such a ridiculous title, you’ve gotta take notice. In this case, it’s not that the title is word garbage like other winners of the coveted “Title of the Year” award, it’s about the fact that Kingdom Hearts somehow requires a 2.8. We already blew 2.5 for the remakes, the almighty 3 is reserved for a game that will never be released in our lifetimes, so 2.8 is the only option. In fact, it will be downright amazing if Kingdom Hearts 3 isn’t released in 2018, because that would mean a game that pretty much exists to promote KH3 would have been released at least two years before its “real” big brother. Or maybe we’ll see a 2.999999 by then…

System of the Year: Nintendo Switch

Ah, nappingThis was the easiest decision on the list. The Nintendo Switch is basically a WiiU+, and that is all I ever wanted. My gaming habits are such that I have… a really short attention span, and being able to migrate from the television to “I’m watching Riverdale now” mode allows for more control than I’m used to having over my library. For years, portable games have been portable games, console games have been console games, and never the twain shall meet. Now I can play my big widescreen games on the TV, get to a more “grindy” area, and casually enjoy the same experience while I’m paying slightly less attention. Now I can play Switch every last hour of the day properly budget my time!

And Nintendo seems to be completely aware of this, too. Breath of the Wild is an amazing, engrossing title… but it also has 120 shrines that seem to be designed to be tackled on a boring bus ride. Super Mario Odyssey has seventy craptillion Power Moons, and you can’t tell me that you’re supposed to explore New Donk City entirely in one sitting. Even some of the less AAA titles, like Mario + Rabbids or Fire Emblem Warriors, seem to be designed with the Switch’s chief appeal in mind, and that’s just peachy.

The Switch isn’t perfect (for some ridiculous reason, it can’t play Super Metroid yet), but if every year is as good for the Switch as its launch, this might wind up being the best system in videogame history, for both software and hardware.

Game of the Year: Sonic Mania

Tails!2017 might have been a horrible year for reality, but it was an amazing year for gaming. NieR: Automata was a long-shot to ever exist, changed the very concept of what a videogame could be, and also somehow sparked a robo-butt renaissance. Persona 5 was the long awaited sequel to Persona 4, already one of my favorite games, and featured the most stylish gameplay and music I’ve seen in a decade. Super Mario Odyssey is just a joy to play from start to finish, and you can control a flappy dinosaur. Breath of the Wild redefined what a Zelda game could be. Even Cuphead could potentially be my game of the year, if only because it reminded us all that you don’t have to be the next Skyrim to change the face of gaming. Man, if we get even one more game like Cuphead in the next decade, I’ll be happy (this includes Cuphead 2, incidentally).

But Sonic Mania? Sonic Mania taught me to love again.

I’ve been playing Sonic the Hedgehog games forever. In fact, I’ve been playing Sonic games as they’ve released as long as the franchise has existed. I gnawed through Sonic Heroes when it first dropped, and learned to live with the werehog one stretchy limb at a time. I played every last 2-D Sonic GBA and DS game, and grimaced as I was told that this was how Sonic always felt. Was… was that true? Were my memories of OG Sonic some illusion of age? Some nostalgia for a game that never truly existed? Was I tapping into a lost dimension every time I booted up my Sega Genesis?

The answer is, obviously, a resounding no, because Sonic Mania is the real Sonic the Hedgehog 4 (& Knuckles).

I’m not going to write another thousand words on why this game is great, but it’s amazing, and it validated my own memories, and, unlike every other amazing game this year, I’m probably going to replay it again from start to finish within the decade, so it’s my game of the year. Sorry, Senran Kagura: Peach Beach Splash, you were this close.

Games I’m sure are great, but I haven’t played: Xenoblade Chronicles 2, Horizon Zero Dawn, Agents of Mayhem

It was a really good year for games! I’ll get to them before next year! Maybe!

Games I’m sure are great, but I still haven’t played: Overwatch, Doom, Undertale

Look, I’ve got the physical version of Undertale coming from Fangamer with some Christmas dough, so I’m pretty sure I’m going to play that this year! Okay!?

Gogglebob.com Introspection 2017

Damn wormFor reasons of my own making, this year has been surprisingly busy since about July. Don’t be concerned, gentle reader, things were complicated for fairly good reasons (or at least expected reasons), but it did make my “hobby blog” a little more difficult to keep on schedule for the last half year or so. But fear not! There’s a reason the FGC didn’t miss an update (give or take that one bout of Trump-induced constipation), and that’s because I genuinely like writing about videogames on this blog. It’s weird! I still maintain that I’m surprised the site has lasted this long, but here we are! Weird! Here’s to another how ever many articles I have in me!

(Though if you’re looking at the Wild Arms 2 Let’s Play updates in real time over at that one forum, you may have noticed a little slow down. Man, I should have waited until Fall to start that thing up.)

Anyway, I’d love to offer some additional insight into the process or something here, but it’s just a matter of playing games, writing about games, and occasionally making weird videos about games. Gotta pick your battles there. And, in that spirit, here are a few articles that haven’t already been linked that I liked this year:

FGC #225 Castlevania Dawn of Sorrow
FGC #243 Dragon’s Lair (NES)
FGC #261 Spice World
FGC #277 New Super Mario Bros. 2
FGC #294 Skullmonkeys
FGC #316 Injustice 2

And I would be remiss if I didn’t note this was the year I started streaming with some random knuckleheads, which is always a good time. Hey, guys, when do you want to do that again?

And on that note, I’m calling this a year reviewed. See you next year! Or this year! Writing things in advance is confusing!

What’s next? Random ROB has chosen… Ninja Master’s! Ninja Master’s… what? Guess we’ll find out! Please look forward to it!

FGC #362 The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild: Champion’s Ballad

Note: This article contains spoilers for the Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild Champion’s Ballad DLC. And regular Breath of the Wild, too. Please be aware.

Zelda!“DLC” has become something of a dirty word of late. Actually, that’s a lie. DLC has always been a dirty word. The mere concept that a videogame producer would choose to “double dip” and charge the poor player for further experiences when sixty buckaroos have already been spent is repulsive to a certain vocal subset of the population. And, honestly, that kind of thinking could be understandable. After all, gaming went through a solid couple of decades before a game ever requested a little more scratch to keep the lights on, and it’s not like Super Metroid ever needed a season pass to be more of a masterpiece. DLC, almost at its core, sounds like a scam, and people are right to be resistant to any profit model that asks for more and more from the consumer.

That said? The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild’s Champion’s Ballad DLC is exactly why DLC is great.

For anyone curious about Champion’s Ballad, but either unable or uninterested in downloading the DLC, here’s a complete run down of what happens…